Left wing agitators in Brooklyn, N.Y. are demanding people boycott a water bottle brand because the packaging is supposedly racist against black people.
I know what you're thinking... How could a water bottle be racist? Did they print Swastikas on the side? Or maybe it's being distributed in a Klan hood and robe?
No, the problem stems from the fact that the bottle is being sold in a 40oz package.
Ounce Water, founded by “Sons of Anarchy” star Theo Rossi, has found itself at the center of a very confusing controversy.
Members of Breukelen RISE, an organization that claims to help "at-risk youth", claims a 40oz bottle pairs with the "traumatic history of malt liquor in the black community."
In other words, 40oz = racist.
However, a spokesperson for the brand says the 40oz bottles have nothing to do with racist (duh). Instead, they're trying to help people reach their health goals.
“Ounce Water sets a daily goal to consume 80 ounces of water, so we provide 20oz and 40oz bottles to make that math simple. The design of our bottle is an old-school nod, and is meant to take something that once was part of poisoning people (malt liquor) and instead fill your bottle with health and life. We are taking a negative and turning it into a positive, and we don’t market the shape of our bottle, strictly market the math and hydration benefits.”
Look, that's all well and good, but now you have the rage mob at your doorstep demanding you stop selling 40oz bottles because racism is bad, or something.
Activist Christine Gilliam said, “That history is of high alcohol content, cheap liquors that were sold and heavily promoted through rap music and all kinds of marketing and entertainment. It is a big part of the demise of a community that already feels it’s under attack. So that, in turn, leads to alcoholism.”
Christine's mother may have consumed too much alcohol while she was carrying her in the womb because if you're upset about marginalized communities consuming too much cheap alcohol then a 40oz bottle of water is your best friend. It's literally the opposite of "high alcohol content, cheap liquors". Come on, lady. Use your frickin' brain.
Gilliam said the water bottles "triggered" people in her neighborhood who dealt with substance abuse issues.
It did? Lady, if you're "triggered" by the sight of water, you have much bigger problems to worry about than the size of a beverage container. Seek help.
Or just don't buy the bottle.
Either way, STFU.