A 27-year-old dude in Louisiana was caught with meth after cops found him walking down the street screaming profanities.
And he claimed that all his paperwork had been stolen by SpongeBob SquarePants.
Believe it or not, this story actually gets weirder.
Louisiana authorities have charged a man with disturbing the peace after he was found wandering down a street and screaming profanities.
The Monroe News Star reports the Ouachita Parish Sherriff's Office responded to a call Sunday that 27-year-old Jonathan Porter was intoxicated and creating a public disturbance. Deputies wrote in arrest warrants that Porter told them the cartoon character SpongeBob SquarePants had stolen his paperwork and that "God has battleships but hasn't sent them yet."
The arrest warrant says deputies noticed a white substance near Porter's mouth and found meth and a narcotic pain reliever in his pockets.
He's also charged with resisting an officer and possession of a controlled dangerous substance.